Tuesday, July 31, 2007
'Cause we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be
Perfect...

Today it seems to be Derrick's turn to be emo. Sigh. He's practically drowning in the sea of his studies and homework and projects of which have yet to be completed, and I can only sit at my computer table reading his messages and feeling pathetically sorry for him. I don't think it was right to even have told him that I went for a movie with Trevor and the guys earlier. God. I feel so pathetic. So useless. So...so...

Guilty.

I feel like I'm the one who should be suffering all that Derrick's suffering. I don't want him to break down and become emo or sink into depression like I did. Everyone says being emo is cool, but what do they really know about it? All there is around you is an empty void of darkness and disenchantment, and life seems to have nothing more to offer you. You tend to neglect the important things that really matter in your life, and mope and cry and worry over the ones that seem to be the most critical at this point in time. Heck, I used to be depressed over my unpopularity and shit and now I'm on the outside, looking in at the most treasured person in my universe depressing over his schoolwork. God.

FUCK SCHOOL.

They should be bombed or set fire to. What good are they for? Hell, what good is education for, other than getting you cushy jobs or social respect? Everyone keeps stressing over the importance of studying and getting good grades, but do they even fucking realize how much this generation despises it and how many people are actually breaking down or committing suicide (touch wood) over examinations? It seems like our whole fucking life depends on one stupid letter on a piece of useless paper. If we don't get that A+ in Geometry or if we don't score at least 85% and above for our overall results, then that's it. SNAP! and next thing you know, this genius leaps off a 20 story building because he failed to attain full marks on his latest History paper that won't even be counted in the semester's marks.

I just wish I could quit school.

Sigh.


These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have all
Of me...





Monday, July 30, 2007
I don't wanna change
I just wanna have fun
I don't wanna be told to grow up
And I'm not gonna change
So why don't you give up?

Yeah, well, sorry for the lack of updates lately. Been busy (or rather, lazy) and didn't have much blogging material. But I'm gonna make it up today, 'cause I took tons of photos (50+, count 'em) at the Tuas Incineration Plant visit today.


Me and Farah





Upon Arriving











Lol, I'm sandwiched in the middle >.<

































































Me and Rabiahtul











After that, went home and ate and played the computer for a bit. Then suddenly, my mood switched from up to down. WAY, WAY,

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I think (and hope) that I have bi-polar disease or something like that. Being abnormal is a privilege. Heh.

Oh yeah, I changed my number to 98671187. Please update accordingly. :)


Did I hear you right
'Cause I thought you said
"Let's think it over"
You have been my life
And I never planned
Growing old without you...








Tuesday, July 10, 2007
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you
Right now...

Sorry for not updating for SO long, but this post will combine a total of three days' events together.

08/07/07

She'd just gotten into the pool when she caught sight of a large group of teenage guys; there were about six of them, and they looked seventeen or eighteen at least. She didn't think too much of them at that time, and ran off to the Slide Tower.

When she hit the splash-down pool and headed up for a second round, she was surprised to see the same bunch of guys she'd noticed earlier going up with her as well, talking and laughing loudly. She tried to study their faces without them seeing. They weren't bad-looking; tanned and tall and definitely the sporty type. But again, she ignored them until when she got out of the splash down pool into the river rapids, and realised that they seemed to be tailing her. They were just behind her.

She went to another pool to see if they followed. Again, the whole group got up after her. Finally she went back to the rapids and as she was splashing through the water to the slide tower again, the group caught up with her, and one of the guys asked her, "What's your name?"

She was shocked at first, but soon answered, "Theresa."

He smiled and gave his name and the others', but she didn't really take in their names - there were far too many for her to remember anyway. When the same guy (his name was Trev, or so the others called him) asked for her number, she simply gave it and realising that she had to leave by then, waved goodbye to the group and ran to join her dad and sister, who were at another pool.

The entire group of guys messaged her that night, and as she looked at the SMSes she had sent, she sighed. Her phone bill could not possibly be any lower than $80, and the absolute limit was $50.

But then, even if her phone line would be cut within the arrival of the next phone bill, at least she had the opportunity to meet some new guys for a change.

09/07/07

She was seated comfortably at the counter, reading a book and waiting for an anime episode of Jigoku Shoujo to load. Then she looked up as a shadow obstructed her reading light, and faced a tall girl who, from the looks of her uniform, was 15 years old. The girl smiled, "You're a librarian?"

"Yeah."

"Haven't seen you around often before. What's your name?"

"Theresa."

"Cool." She entered into the section behind the counter, which meant that she had the authorization to do so and not be barked at by the teacher in charge of the library who was seated at her own computer nearby. She was clearly another librarian.

"What are you watching?" she asked, peering at the monitor and taking a seat beside her.

"Jigoku Shoujo. Hell Girl. An anime. Do you watch it?"

She shook her head. "Never heard of it. But it sounds cool. Hey," she said, seeing the eBuddy messenger pop up on the monitor. "Add me too." She gave her email and viewed her (Theresa's) friendster.

"What's flirty, exactly?" She asked, reading the About Me section on the page.

At that moment, a tall, upper secondary boy wanted to borrow a book, so Theresa took his book, typed in it's barcode and his IC, and said, "I'll show you what's the meaning of flirty."

She passed the book back to the boy and said, "Hey cutie, can I have your number?" Turning her attention back to the girl, she answered, "THAT'S flirting."

The boy was clearly shocked. He took his book and hurried off.

She and the other girl just laughed.

10/07/07

During Math period, the last session of the day, she noticed that Irsyad, a small-sized Malay boy of whose cheeks she liked pinching had JOB DONE! stickers stuck all over the shoulders of his shirt.

The sight looked so funny she couldn't resist taking pictures of him with the stickers, although it was a great risk to take in front of such a strict teacher.

She'd also managed to acquire the ball in which the stickers were rolled in after Irsyad had peeled them off his back.

(Photos later.)

Tell me

Have you ever loved and lost somebody

Wished there was a chance to say I'm sorry

Can't you see

'Cause that's the way I feel, about you and me, baby...